


Return to Sender

by PenguinMerchant



Category: Captive Prince - C. S. Pacat
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Victorian, Enemies to Lovers, Epistolary, Fluff, Fluff all the way down, M/M, complete fluff, kind of?, like wrong number au?, wrong letter AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-07-28
Updated: 2020-07-28
Packaged: 2021-03-04 19:02:37
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 18,305
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/25261297
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/PenguinMerchant/pseuds/PenguinMerchant
Summary: When Damen agrees to help his brother settle a land dispute between their family and the neighboring estate belonging to the de Vere's, Damen assumes it will be a short and businesslike task.  It's not, of course--nothing involving Laurent de Vere ever is--and when Damen mistakenly sends a letter to him instead of to his brother complaining about his haughty demeanor and yes, okay, mentioning he might want to murder him, things become a bit more complicated.A story of Damen and Laurent's relationship, told from the various letters they send.
Relationships: Damen/Laurent (Captive Prince)
Comments: 84
Kudos: 236





	Return to Sender

**Author's Note:**

> Yes I am back on my bullshit, I'm sorry. I hope you guys enjoy.

\- April 22nd -

Kastor,

You are going to need to find someone else to handle this land dispute between us and the de Veres. Laurent de Vere is the most brash, arrogant, stubborn and willfully malicious person I have ever dealt with. If you don't want to have to come visit me in the Tower of London (do they even allow visitors?) for murdering the lowly brother of a viscount—although I suspect he is adopted because of how much demon blood runs through his veins—then you will need to find someone else to deal with this because I am done.

Yours,

Damen

PS—He told me that he wished we were better strangers. What kind of insult even is that? I hate him.

\- April 23rd -

My Lord Akielos,

I am writing to you under the most genuine concern for your staff. It appears as though a missive intended for your brother was mistakenly sent to me instead; under most circumstances I would chalk up the mistake to a distracted secretary and advise caution, but the letter was written with such atrocious handwriting and with so many grammatical errors that I couldn't in good faith let such things go without warning you about the barbaric skills of said secretary. I certainly would never dream of telling you what to do but if someone of that caliber was on my staff I would let him go without further thought and would not write him a letter of recommendation, either. He doesn't deserve to work with anything involving letters or handwriting; perhaps the night soil collector in your household needs a new helper, since he seems better suited to that kind of job.

Consider these words no more than a kindness from one lowly younger brother to another.

Signed the Brash, Arrogant, Stubborn, Willfully Malicious,

Laurent de Vere

PS—I will be keeping the mistakenly sent letter as proof against any harm coming to my person. And no, they don't allow visitors.

\- April 24th - 

My Lord de Vere,

Please excuse the mistake. As I'm sure you're aware I have no secretary at the moment and I penned that missive myself, and must have mixed up my outgoing mail. Please excuse any rudeness that you might have intuited from my previous letter, I was exceedingly drunk when I wrote it.

Sincerely,

Damianos Akielos

PS—You have no need to worry about any harm coming to your person. I meant it in jest, and not in any seriousness. I am most ashamed of any words that gave you the impression I wanted any harm to come to you.

\- April 26th -

My lord Akielos,

I am sorry to hear that, my lord. In hindsight my missive must have come across as quite rude as well; of course I didn't mean to imply that _you_ would make a good night soil collector, if that is what you deduced from my letter. And the drunkenness would account for the atrocious handwriting, as well. Perhaps you have been imbibing more than is seemly, my lord? I seem to recall similar handwriting in previous missives, as well as your inability to spell any words with more than seven letters. I only ask because I am a concerned citizen, and not to imply any more insult to your person, of course.

I am, as always,

etc

PS—Perhaps I misunderstand your use of the word “impression” but I do believe that saying you would murder me counts as more than just an “impression”. I would blame your secretary for such shoddy work, alas...

\- April 26th -

My Lord de Vere,

I am truly grateful for your entirely sincere concern for the state of my inebriation. If it helps your decisions any I truly only drink whenever I receive one of your delightful missives so if you would like to help me along the path to sobriety I would ask that you not write me anymore.

Sincerely,

Not Entirely Sober Damianos

\- April 27th -

My Lord Not Entirely Sober,

If we are ever going to settle this land dispute I can hardly avoid writing you, don't you agree? Or would you prefer to do this in person, where I can eviscerate you verbally instead? It has been what, ten years since we've seen each other? I believe we both attended some horrid ball right before you left for whatever backwater university you attended, but I think that was the last time we--or indeed, any member of our families--were in the same room together. I am not one to break a good luck streak like that but I will do so if there is no other way.

Don't worry, I would understand if you are too scared. Until then, I remain,

Your Pen Pal,

Laurent de Vere

\- April 27th -

Cambridge can hardly be called a backwater university. Take it back.

\- April 27th -

My Lord Akielos,

Oh, you attended Cambridge? That would explain all of the spelling errors, then.

Signed,

An Oxford Man

\- April 29th -

de Vere,

I think it should be pretty obvious by now that we are not going to come to any sort of peaceful resolution to this land dispute. Why don't we just leave things they way they were before you stirred everything up and you'll never have to talk to me again.

Unless...

...you're doing this because you like talking to me? Was this whole ploy of yours just a design to further our acquaintance? You're a sly one, Laurent. I didn't think you had it in you. There are other ways to get my attention, you know, no need to resort to underhanded tactics like this.

Signed,

Yours affectionately,

Damen

\- May 2nd -

Mr. Akielos,

I am well aware of the best way to get your attention, and so is half of the population of London. Believe me, that was a method that I entertained for a fraction of a second before deciding to start this endless letter writing war with you, which at the time I deemed the better of the two options. The time I have spent both reading your execrable writing and the time spent carefully crafting responses to you has been unending, tedious and terrible and yet I would still choose it a hundred times over.

That land is ours. Your family has been in possession of it under false assumptions of ownership and now it is time for it to be restored to the de Vere family, where it belongs. Sign off on the papers and you will be thankfully rid of me forever. You know it's the right thing to do.

Signed,

Yours unaffectionately,

Laurent de Vere

\- May 2nd -

Laurent,

Are you implying that half the population of London wants to fuck me?

Yours truly,

Damen

\- May 3rd -

Akielos,

Your reading skills, like every other meager skill you possess, needs help. I was obviously implying that half of the population of London had _already_ fucked you and therefore already knew how to get your attention—mainly by being a person who was alive and breathing. If there is any other common thread between your numerous paramours I haven't discerned it, but I have a feeling that being discerning isn't a quality that you have in spades so I don't feel too badly about missing those clues, if there were in fact any to find.

Also I have not given you leave to address me by my first name, and I would appreciate it if you stopped calling me by such immediately.

With NO kind regards,

de Vere

\- May 5th -

Darling,

Your slander wounds me, although I know its just your jealousy talking. You shouldn't believe all the gossip you hear at any rate; I am not as prolific as some would make me out to be. One jilted lover has made it her mission to embarrass me in the eyes of the _ton_ , but what she really wasn't counting on was that I don't give a rat's arse what they think about me, or if they think I am a rake. It only hurts me now knowing that you, my secret admirer, have fallen for her lies. If I could undo the past I would, but alas! Perhaps we are only destined to be star crossed lovers.

Yours forever and always, truly,

Damen

PS—Two households, both alike in dignity, in fair London, where we lay our scene...

\- May 8th -

Gigantic Barbarian,

I called in a few favors with some people I know. They do allow visitors in the Tower of London. I hope this changes your stance on not murdering me; I would vastly prefer that to any continued correspondence with you.

Hopefully soon to be deceased,

Laurent de Vere

PS--"Alike in dignity"? I don't think so. I remember reading about a ball that the Akielos family hosted that resulted in no less than three broken noses and one arrest. And there was mention of a pig going loose in the house that knocked over the Earl of Fortaine into something that was described as a champagne pyramid. Our houses are nothing alike, in dignity or otherwise.

PPS—It is a little less Shakespearean, but—sign the goddamn papers.

\- May 10th -

de Vere,

Before I sign anything, let me show you the land that you are proposing you take from us. I want to introduce you to the man who lives on the estate there, whose family has lived in that farmhouse for the last three generations. The least you can do is look him in the eye and tell him that you are kicking him out of his ancestral home because you want an extra rent payment every year. If you do that, if you come with me and meet him, I promise I will sign over the papers to you that day.

Sincerely,

Damianos

PS--The pig's name was Kevin and he was invited. The loss of the champagne was regrettable, though. It was also one of the best parties I've ever been to, so I'll take my dignity-less house over yours any day. I'm sure the balls the de Vere family hosts are full of boring stuffy people reading quietly in separate areas of the house. Is there even any dancing at a de Vere party? Do you even know how to dance?

\- May 12th -

Akielos,

If you think you are going to appeal to my empathetic side, I can assure you right now it doesn't exist. So lets just drop the pretense of this bit of theater and just sign the papers.

Sincerely,

de Vere

PS--Of course I know how to dance. If you think my parents skimped on any tutors for me or my brother you are sorely mistaken. Just because I find it distasteful and boring doesn't mean I don't know how. Much like how I've been writing to you for the last few weeks; I find _that_ distasteful and boring as well and yet I have an obligation to do so, and so here I am. 

PPS--Color me not surprised that you not only invited a pig to a ball but that he was present in one of the "best parties [you've] ever been to". It fits your whole...demeanor perfectly.

\- May 13th -

de Vere,

You have heard my terms. I will sign the papers when you come with me to visit Mr. Aktis. That's his name, you know. The name of the person you will be making homeless once you take his land away from him. He's a widower, by the way. No children, his wife died after they were only a few months married. He's been tending the land by himself for the last ten years and is one of the hardest workers I've ever known. He is a good man, and deserves more than to be a pawn in a shameless land grab.

Sincerely,

Damianos

\- May 15th -

Damianos,

I see that you have once again mistaken me for someone who is moved by trifling plays of pity. I am sorry that the man will have to find another home but it doesn't change the fact that he has been working and living on land that does not belong to him, or to you. If you feel so kindly towards him you are free to help him find somewhere else to live.

Sincerely,

de Vere

PS—It is too bad you already told me he doesn't have children. You could have hired a few child actors to complete the scene of utter helpless domesticity.

PPS—It wouldn't have helped. I would have appreciated the effort, though.

\- May 15th -

You are a cold hearted son of a bitch, do you know that?

\- May 15th -

Don't you know? They call me the Ice King.

\- May 18th -

de Vere,

I think that only someone who does not know you very well would describe you as an Ice King (or perhaps Ice Lowly-Younger-Brother-of-a-Viscount would be a more accurate title, although it doesn't have quite the same ring to it). They say that freezing to death is a relatively painless experience, like going to sleep, and to me that doesn't ring true to your nature. I think you would be more accurately described as a Lava King (or Lava Lowly-Younger-Brother, etc) for a few different reasons, if you'll hear me out.

One, lava can be slow moving which gives the appearance of being easily escaped, letting its victims believe that they can reasonably get away before realizing they're surrounded by death and fire on all sides with all escape routes blocked. Two, lava can harden into volcanic rock which can seem solid, solid enough to safely walk on, but will crumble quickly when pressure is applied leaving the poor person who was dumb enough to walk on it consumed by the hotly moving lava underneath, where they will slowly and very painfully burn to death as the flames eat them from the outside in.

What do you think? I can start spreading the new nickname if you like.

Sincerely,

Someone not dumb enough to walk on volcanic rocks

\- May 19th -

My Lord Absolutely Dumb Enough to Walk on Volcanic Rocks,

I think if your metaphors were any clumsier I could very well take that as a proposal of marriage. Please restrain yourself.

Sincerely,

Lava Lowly-Younger-Brother-of-a-Viscount

\- May 21st -

Lavarent,

You must not receive (or give) many offers of marriage if you think that counted as one. And my metaphors are never clumsy. They are as swift and biting as a snake. Or as swift and biting as _you_.

Damen

PS—My one condition to signing over the land still stands. It is a simple enough condition, I think, and one that wouldn't inconvenience you terribly. It seems silly not to accept just because you're afraid of falling in love with me the moment you lay eyes on me.

\- May 23rd -

Damen,

I was under the impression that one typically only receives (or gives) one proposal in their life. If you've personally given (or received) any more than that, you are doing something wrong, especially as I know that you are currently unmarried. Perhaps you've given more than your fair share and just been turned down? It's not my place to judge, of course. As they say, if at first you don't succeed, try, try again. I've never had to implement that in my life since I always achieve what I set out to do the first time, of course, but for someone like you I'm aware even common tasks can seem trying.

Speaking of, I'm not even sure I can accurately describe how much your “metaphor” offended me, as a man who has had more than an elementary education and knows the difference between a metaphor and a simile. I am not going to try to explain the difference to you. I have a headache today and trying to parse your writing made every thought in my head shatter into a million pieces which lodged themselves into various areas of my brain, killing me instantly. I hope you're happy.

Sincerely,

Lava Snake

PS—FINE name your time and I will go visit the land with you, you uncouth man. Don't worry, I will gird my loins appropriately.

\- May 24th -

Laurent,

I can't believe that you accepted my invitation in a post script. Who's uncouth now? Meet me at the estate in question at noon on the 2nd. Since I haven't seen you since you were thirteen (have you not attended _any_ parties in the last ten years?) I will expect to look for an awkward, lanky blonde with a tongue that can flay the hide off a cow and who plucks h'or d'ouevres off a plate like they had personally offended him.

Sincerely,

Damen

PS—Thank you.

\- May 26th -

Damen,

I see you finally looked up what a metaphor is. And I suspect I will have no trouble recognizing you either; the last time I saw you you were a giant, lumbering thing with more brawn than brain and I don't expect much has changed, although it is entirely possible that the ratio between the two--with brains being on the worse side of the equation, in case that wasn't clear--has gotten worse.

And no, I don't attend _any_ parties when I can possibly avoid them. I find them to be more tedious than anything, and now that Auguste has married and produced two heirs I find I don't even have to put up the pretense of making polite excuses. The de Vere name has far better people than I representing it and, as you have probably guessed based on this correspondence, I tend to do more harm than good anyway. Everyone benefits from this arrangement, you see. As soon as we conclude our business with the land I'm sure you will be happy to join the rest of the _ton_ in never having to deal with me again.

Sincerely,

Laurent

\- May 27th -

Laurent,

Have you been to see the Elgin Marbles at the British Museum? I went a few years ago with my friend Nikandros. They were quite possibly the most exquisite things I've ever seen. We could go visit, if you wanted. I promise you they are the opposite of tedium, and I think you would like them.

Damen

\- May 31st -

Lord Damianos,

I know you are in the habit of sending letters to the incorrect address, having no secretary and all. I believe that was the case with the previous missive you sent me, the one about the British Museum. You might want to look to that.

Sincerely,

Laurent de Vere

\- June 1st -

Laurent,

I sent the letter correctly. I'm even fairly certain I addressed it to the correct person; I believe I used the right name and everything.

Damen

\- June 1st -

Damen,

You're about to be rid of me. We are meeting tomorrow to finish this land dispute and then you will never have to see me again, which is the preference of most people who are unfortunate enough to know me. I have done nothing this entire time except insult you, your family and every aspect of interacting with you. I don't understand.

Laurent

\- June 1st -

If you don't want to go, you can say no.

\- June 1st -

No, that's not what I meant. I'll...think about it. Maybe you can decide after we're done tomorrow if you still even want to extend the invitation. I won't hold you to it if you change your mind.

I will see you tomorrow.

\- June 3rd -

Laurent,

Well, it's done. I've sent all of the papers over to my lawyers, who will be in touch with yours soon. You know, you didn't have to bring Mrs. Varenne along with you, although her two children were adorable (are you sure they weren't paid actors? I wouldn't ask except you've already put the idea in my head). I promised you I would sign over the papers if you came and visited the land, and I would have done so even if you hadn't introduced me to your new tenant. I was very sorry to hear about the difficult life she's had, and I'll admit I was a little surprised when she told me that you had offered her the house at such a low rent. I'll let you know now that you'll be losing money if you charge that little, especially with some of the repairs that need to be done to make the living acceptable for a woman and two small children. But...it's good of you, to look out for her like that. Especially since she doesn't have anyone else to help her.

Anyway, I wanted to tell you it was good seeing you again. I'm sorry if I was a bit...strange, when I first saw you, but I hadn't expected...well, I hadn't expected the difference ten years would make in your countenance, in all honesty. I almost didn't recognize you, and perhaps wouldn't have if it weren't for your blonde hair, which is obviously a de Vere family trait. But it was good to finally meet the man behind all of the barbed letters I've been receiving these last few weeks. You were different to what I was expecting. In a good way.

With kind regards,

Damen

PS—The offer of accompanying you to the museum still stands. Assuming it's even something you're interested in, that is. I don't want to pressure you if you're not interested but I think you would enjoy them and I would be interested in showing them to you. If you're amenable.

\- June 3rd -

Nikandros,

I need you to come over right now. I am in serious trouble.

Damen

\- June 4th -

Damen,

The next time you call me over in the middle of the night you'd better be captured by pirates or some such. I cannot believe you made me get up from bed and visit you because you are having a crisis about Laurent de Vere, of all people. I will never understand what goes on in that brain of yours. Don't bother me today, I'll be sleeping off all of that ridiculous rambling you did last night until at least noon. Do you remember you actually used the phrase “golden haired Adonis”? Seriously, Damen.

Nik

\- June 12th -

Dear Docent Damen,

You were right, the Elgin Marbles were breathtaking. I can't help but think that the Greeks must be upset that they're not in their home in the Parthenon. I would say it's a shame they lost them, but that implies rather that we (as subjects of Great Britain) had nothing to do with the whole process of stealing them away. Would it be selfish of me to say that I enjoyed them immensely anyway, and that I would be worse off for _not_ having seen them, which would most likely be the case if they were still in their home in Greece? Ah, I suppose it would. Please forget I said it.

And you were...surprisingly knowledgeable about them. Not surprising in the sense that I didn't think you capable of knowing so much, just surprising that it was something that you had obviously done some research on. Thank you for showing them to me. I suppose I should have probably warned you of this in advance (as if you could not deduce it from our earlier correspondence or the preponderance of rumors about me) but I am very rarely in the company of anyone except my brother and his family for any amount of time as I find most acquaintances distasteful. I was very glad to find that was not the case today, and I actually enjoyed your company. That is enough sentiment from me, I'm afraid. Thank you again.

Regards,

Laurent

PS--I have to admit...you were not what I was expecting either.

\- June 17th -

Brother, 

When I asked you to take care of the land issue, I didn't mean for you to sign over the land to those abominable de Vere's without a fight! What were you thinking? How am I supposed to trust you with helping me run our estates if you can't handle something this simple? I demand that you give me an accurate accounting of what happened. If the de Veres swindled you in any way I will set the lawyers on them immediately, but I must know the details of the situation. I will expect a response from you within the day.

Kastor

\- June 17th -

~~Kastor,~~

~~You asked me to take care of this, and I did. It's not my fault that it didn't conclude to your satisfaction but~~

~~Kastor,~~

~~That land wasn't ours. The de Veres had proof of it and we're lucky they are not suing us for back payments  
~~

~~Kastor,~~

~~The next time you ask me to handle something like this I am going to assume that you mean you want to constantly interfere and not let me do what I think is right, like you have any idea of what is right and what is wrong~~

\- June 18th -

Laurent,

I went over to visit Mr. Aktis today to help him move out of his old homestead. He told me some very interesting things, and it turns out that I ended up not needing to help him at all. Could you possibly imagine what he told me?

Damen

\- June 18th -

Damen,

I'm sure it was nothing so interesting to someone of your immeasurable intelligence.

Laurent

\- June 19th -

Laurent,

I would thank you for the flattery except I know you well enough to know you were being sarcastic. I would even venture to say that I know you well enough, despite our relatively short acquaintance, to know that it was perhaps even _extremely_ sarcastic.

It is nice of you to let him stay on the estate. I know converting that old barn into living quarters is not going to be cheap, but you could not have helped out a better man. I know it isn't like this between us but I owe you. If you ever need a favor you have but to ask.

Warm regards,

Damen

\- June 20th -

Damen,

According to Mrs. Varenne she and Mr. Aktis had time to work out an agreement between the two of them while we were, and I quote, "bickering like little children on the lawn". I personally don't recall bickering with you but Mrs. Varenne is a respectable woman and I would never accuse her of lying. Apparently she said she would feel safer with a respectable man on the property who knows the area. Mr. Aktis also, being exceedingly fond of children on the account that he never got the chance to have any with his own wife, agreed to help look after the children sometimes for a very modest fee, which she told me would be an immense help to her. Apparently (again, she is not the lying type, nor a fool, and so I trust her judgement) she discerned that Mr. Aktis has a true heart. Her words, of course, not mine. I can't say I understand her judgement exactly but she seemed delighted when I offered her this solution. As did he.

All that to say, it was not entirely my doing. But I will take you up on that favor regardless. And soon, most likely.

Regards,

Laurent

PS--I suspect that I helped more than one good man when I decided to help Mr. Aktis. 

\- June 25th -

Dear Auguste,

If I wanted to bring someone to this ball you are forcing me to attend next month, would you tease me endlessly about it or simply be happy enough I am actually attending and not pretending to have pneumonia, as I did last year? Please give me your response soon and know that if you try to embarrass me I will make you regret it.

All my love,

Laurent

\- June 26th -

Dearest baby brother,

I KNEW you were faking it last year. Helene told me that you would never stoop that low but I know you better and I know exactly how low you will stoop to get out of something you find objectionable. Do not think I will be throwing away this letter--I will be keeping it as proof of your treachery.

And of course you may bring someone. I will not tease you endlessly, I love you and I only want what's best for you. I AM your older brother though, so you must expect SOME amount of teasing. But I promise it will have a resolute end date.

Your loving older brother,

Auguste

PS--I can't believe you wrote to ask me if you could bring a date. My smile is bright enough to blind my wife and children. I will blame you, of course, for their new predicament, as it is technically your fault for making me so happy.

PPS--A DATE!!! An actual date! Congrats, Laurent. This is a new leaf for you, a springtime of possibilities! Will you not tell me who the lucky bastard is? Don't leave me in the dark. Is it that man from the bookshop we met while we were shopping a few months ago who asked to call on you? 

PPPS--No, I just recall you told that man you would rather eat your own liver than have to subject yourself to having one more boring conversation with him. My mistake. Unless he was encouraged by that? I have to say if that's the case I do not approve. He sounds dreadful. Please don't bring him, Laurent. 

PPPPS--Unless you really want to. I want to always support you in all endeavors. He was rather strange though, even you have to admit that. Well, as long as you're happy, brother.

PPPPPS--I suppose he was attractive enough in his own way, but I do not like the insinuation that he would enjoy watching you eating your own liver. I think it speaks of something unnatural. There are other fish in the sea, you know. I have a few friends from my time at Oxford that I could introduce you to, if you like. Please don't bring the liver man with you.

PPPPPPS--Helene says I should not judge and should let you do as you like. So please disregard everything stated above. Be happy and free and know that I will love you no matter what. Even if you and liver man end up being soulmates and escaping to Gretna Green.

\- June 27th -

Damen,

You wrote earlier of owing me a favor. Perhaps it was in jest, or perhaps you thought I might never cash it in. If so I am sorry because I do intend to call upon it now, if you meant it in all seriousness. Do not think that you are obligated to do it if you do not feel comfortable, or do not want to. I would not want to put you in any sort of uncomfortable position and so you only need to say the word and I will retract the request.

Sincerely,

Laurent

\- June 28th -

Dearest Laurent,

I cannot believe you had your man turn me away at the door today. You are unconscionably rude, baby brother.

Love,

Auguste

\- June 29th -

Laurent,

Typically these things go a little easier if you mention what the favor is. To be fair there are a few things I would be unwilling to do for you--murder someone, perhaps (although we have established that visiting hours in the Tower of London can be fairly agreeable, so I'll put that on my "maybe" list) or something equally as horrifying, like reading a book or something. You have but to say the word and you favor will be cashed.

Damen

PS--The book thing was a joke. I can read. I like to read. I especially like to read blistering missives from you.

PPS--You may put me in any uncomfortable position you like.

\- July 1st -

Laurent,

I am sorry, all right? No further words of ridicule will ever leave my mouth for as long as I live. You are a stubborn little gremlin sometimes. You'd better let me in the next time I call on you and you'd BETTER be reading these letters and not destroying them.

All of my love (and some of my annoyance)

Auguste

\- July 2nd -

Damen,

My brother is holding a ball in a few weeks at his London estate. Apparently it is payment for getting to be a Viscount and never having to spend a day in his life working. His wife Helene makes all of the arrangements, of course, so he does not do any work for this either, continuing the trend. At any rate, I have been informed in no uncertain terms that calling out sick or spending the evening in the nursery watching my nephews will not be acceptable. Since, as you have so politely pointed out in previous communications, I have never attended _any_ balls when I can avoid them, I find that I am unenthusiastic about the prospect of going to this one without having someone there who I know. Auguste will be there, of course, as will Helene, but they will both be busy with hosting duties and won't be able to keep me company. I know you, obviously, and our previous outings have shown me that a few hours in your company would not be entirely unpleasant, and so I believe that it might be possible to save myself from an extremely uncomfortable night if you were at the ball as well. If you are amenable to the prospect. And if you are in town. And if you do not believe that spending an evening with me would be too much of a bore for you.

Regards,

Laurent

PS--I figured. And I know you do.

PPS--You are a brute. And I know I can.

\- July 2nd -

Dearest Little Brother,

Thank you for finally allowing me inside your home. I assume this means I am totally forgiven (although I expect the new book I came with as a peace offering didn't hurt my chances). It was good seeing you. You seemed...different than usual. Brighter. Now don't take that as some sort of underhanded thing, I am trying to be nice. It's good to see you like that. It's not often I get to see your smile and today it seemed to be out more than usual.

Yours forever,

Auguste

\- July 3rd -

Laurent,

You have written me a lot of words (which I enjoyed, of course, as we have previously established) and yet I find myself reading it over and over to discern if you ever specifically requested anything of me. I am aware you do not like balls and the prospect of attending one alone does not suit you, but so far I do not see how I am supposed to remedy the situation. Perhaps if you worded it a little more plainly, I would be able to discern your meaning a little more clearly. I am but a simple man who only took the highest honors from my pitiful Cambridge education, which I'm sure will mean little to a man from Oxford, but I find that sometimes I need things explained to me in great detail before I'm able to follow the thread. Perhaps you could phrase what favor you would like from me in the form of a question? I will start it for you, if that helps. Damen, will you please accompany me...

With warm regards,

A Brute

\- July 4th -

Dear Brute,

You obviously know what I was referring to. Playing coy does not suit you. Are you seriously going to make me spell it out for you?

With regards retracted,

Laurent

\- July 4th -

Yes

\- July 4th -

Damen,

What a waste of a messenger. I hope you tipped the poor boy well, just to deliver a message to me all the way on the other side of town with just one word scrawled on a piece of scrap paper. I should be insulted. I believe I am insulted. I promised Auguste I would not pretend to be sick again this year but you are making me consider purposefully poisoning myself so that I am _actually_ sick, thus allowing me to keep my promise while still forgoing the need to attend. That is the state that you have pushed me to, and I hope you're happy.

But. For now--and don't make me regret this--I am considering the following to be only slightly more promising than poisoning myself. I hope you enjoy that you've dragged that confession from my cold, black heart.

Damen, will you please accompany me to my brother's stupid ball so that I don't have to go by myself and be miserable, and instead can spend the evening with someone I'm at least acquainted with in a passing sense so that I can hope to be only slightly less miserable and would perhaps even be, dare I say, maybe not miserable at all if the person in question weren't so unbearably mean?

Forcibly yours,

Laurent

\- July 4th -

Yes

\- July 4th -

You are a fiend, Damianos. I don't even know why I bother.

\- July 5th -

Nikandros this is a level 3 emergency. I request your presence immediately although I may as well tell you now there are no pirates here, nor any other brigands that are holding me hostage or otherwise threatening my person.

\- July 5th -

Damen, 

Why don't you tell me what the emergency is and I will decide if it requires me to get out of my obligations today. 

Nikandros

\- July 5th -

Nik,

Laurent asked me to accompany him to Viscount de Vere's annual ball. Sort of? I owed him a favor and so he called in that favor by requesting my presence at this ball, which he's being forced to attend and he hates balls but he's willing to go if I'm there and I'm wondering if this is a date or some sort of courtship thing or if this is a friends thing and he didn't seem happy about it (or about anything really but that's to be expected) but then again he doesn't really like balls so that makes sense but I don't know if I'm just going as a way for him to get through this with someone that he knows or if he actually wants my company as in my company specifically or just wants someone there who he knows and it doesn't really matter who and I'm just the most convenient person? I can't remember if that sentence started out as a question, I'm sorry.

Please, Nik, you have to help me.

Your (confused, helpless, please help me) best friend,

Damen

\- July 5th -

Were you not going to the Viscount's ball anyway? I received my invitation weeks ago.

\- July 5th -

That's not the POINT you have to come over and help me.

\- July 5th -

No

\- July 7th -

Brother,

Did you not receive my last letter? I am only asking because I never received an explanation from you as to why you gave up our family's land so easily despite the fact that I requested an immediate accounting. I expect a response to this one, otherwise I will assume something disastrous has befallen you and will withhold your allowance accordingly.

Also, mother has bade me to remind you that you are to attend our annual Autumn ball next month. I know she is not _your_ mother but she would, for some godforsaken reason, be upset if you don't show and so I'm hoping to appeal to your sensitive side. I suppose I should warn you now as well that Jokaste will be accompanying me. If you need to throw a fit about this please do so now so that you can act appropriately towards both of us while we're in public.

Kastor

\- July 8th -

Kastor,

You may withhold any amount of allowance you like from me. You know very well that I have my own investments and I need no money from you. And I see no need to give you an accounting of anything regarding the land issue with the de Veres. We were in possession of that land under false assumptions, and now it has been restored to the proper owner. That is all there is to it.

Secondly, I have already spoken to mother about attending the Autumn ball when I called on her for tea last week. I have been every year without fail since I was old enough to attend so I find it curious that she reminded you to tell me about it. Were I a more cynical man I would assume you just wanted to try and rub my face in the fact that you are attending it with Jokaste, but as I have previously told you (and her, for that matter) I don't really care what the two of you do. I am certainly not going to throw a fit about it. I will treat the both of you with all of the grace and civility you deserve.

Damen

\- July 8th -

Laurent, 

You told me once (bragged, really, is the word I would use, but that is neither here nor there) that you were not denied any tutors growing up. You wouldn't have happened to be trained in swordplay, would you? I feel the need to stab something right now. Are you free today?

Damen

\- July 8th -

Damen 

I am free today and luckily for you I have been trained in swordplay. However if you are looking to stab something you will be sorely disappointed. I am very good. I will be over shortly.

Laurent

\- July 10th -

Laurent,

I know I told you as much yesterday, but I continue to be impressed by your sword work. You must have trained for a very long time to be able to be as good as you are. I know it may sound like I'm coddling you but I'm really not; even Nikandros, who I have been training with for years, has not been able to get inside of my guard as easily as you did. And your footwork was superb. I have never seen anyone move as fast as you do. 

That being said, don't feel bad that I beat you. Sword fighting was always my most favorite pastime and I neglected more than a few of my studies to become as proficient as I am. I suspect you have never neglected any studies in your entire life, and you're better off for it--your brawn to brain ratio is of a more pleasing proportion than mine, I think.

Regards,

Damen

PS--I suppose I already said this as well, but thank you for listening to me complain about my tedious family issues. I was exceptionally happy that you decided to stay for dinner even though I was in such a miserable funk. Thank you.

\- July 11th -

Damen,

Don't worry, I am not so egotistical that I can't admit when someone has superior skills in an area that I am only proficient in. You need not worry about offending me; it has been quite a while since I've been challenged like that, and I found it to be quite exhilarating. Besides, I am sure with a few more weeks of us sparring I will be able to beat you anyway. That is, if you want to continue. And if you're okay with dealing with your inevitable defeat.

On a completely different topic, I need you to clear your schedule next Wednesday. You took me to a museum to show me some beautiful sculptures and now I am going to take you...well, I am not going to tell you where. It will be a surprise. But I think you will like it, so don't put up too much of a fuss about it.

Affectionately, 

Laurent

PS--Your brawn to brain ratio is more than adequate. Do not trouble yourself on that account. 

\- July 11th -

NIKANDROS

\- July 11th -

I'm not coming over, Damen

\- July 16th -

Laurent,

I am going to see you at the ball in a few days so I will not make this exceptionally long, but I just wanted to say how much I enjoyed our outing today. I did not expect in a million years that you would take me to the horse races, nor did I expect that you had such an excellent grasp of horses. To be honest I did not picture you as someone who would enjoy wagering on anything but I should have known that you would be as good at that as you are at everything else. I know you told me it had to do with a lot of technical things, like the way the horses cantered or the way the jockeys sat on their saddles, but I still can't help but suspect there was some measure of witchcraft to it. You are unnaturally prescient, I think. 

Since you helped me win a whole ten pounds by suggesting a horse to bet on I considered it only fair that at least some of that money is returned to you. Please accept the book I've sent with this letter; it was something I enjoyed reading very much (I told you, I do read) and the last time I was over at your home I noticed that you did not have a copy of it.

Sincerely,

Someone who still smells vaguely of horses

PS--I will pick you up at 8:00 on the day of the ball. I promise I will not be late.

\- July 20th -

Laurent, 

Well? How did you find your very first ball? Did I, as your date, adequately meet all of your social needs for the night? Please advise me so that I may better accompany you in the future if you find yourself still wishing for my company. Any tips would be appreciated if you found me lacking in absolutely any area.

Damen

PS--I suppose I will give you the satisfaction of telling you that your brother's party has replaced the party with the pig as my favorite. 

\- July 20th -

Damen, 

It's a little presumptuous of you to assume that this was my first ball. I have told you that I typically avoid them because I find them tedious; however, not everyone in my life has conspired to subject themselves to my whims as easily as you have, and so I think you will find that I have been coerced into attending a few of them in the past. Is that upsetting to you, that you were not my first? I hope that is not the case. As we have previously established, you have been to rather a lot of parties in your time, so you can hardly be mad that I have a few under my belt as well. Not as many, certainly, but I am no blushing virgin, if you'll excuse the entendre.

As to your performance for the evening, I can confidently say that my decision to bring you along was a correct one. Can we please take a moment to congratulate me on that front? You were a good enough dancer to keep up with me, you used all of the correct dinner forks at the table and did not accidentally stab yourself, and you managed to spend an entire five minutes in conversation with my Great Aunt Imelda, which I believe is a world record. As there were no barnyard animals to contend with I was unable to judge your proficiency in that regard, but based on previous actions I would assume you would perform adequately at that as well.

Have I left anything important out? You made the evening tolerable, and I hope that is glowing enough praise for you. I wouldn't want to engorge your ego too much. 

Happy and very tired,

Laurent

PS--I would hope so, Damianos. I don't know whether or not I should be offended that assaulting me on the balcony at my brother's ball rates only slightly higher than you chasing around a pig covered in mud who knocked over an eighty-seven-year-old man into a tower of champagne, but--actually, now that I say that, our evening does seem to pale in comparison. I retract the complaint.

\- July 20th -

Laurent,

Come now, assaulting? The way I understand it, one of the participants has to be unwilling for it to be considered assault. And you one hundred percent, most definitely kissed me back. If we are going to be petty about it, I even seem to recall being pushed up against a wall in a dark hallway and kissed rather forcefully at one point, although I will tell you now (also without the intent to engorge anything) that it was quite possibly the best thing that has ever happened to me. 

Affectionately yours,

Damen

PS--And nowhere did I say it rates only "slightly higher". I would give up a million parties with mud soaked pigs just to get the chance to kiss you again. 

PPS--Tell me that's not the most romantic thing you've ever heard.

PPPS--You can just call the pig Kevin. I know the two of you haven't formally met but he would not be offended, I am sure.

\- July 20th -

Damen,

Believe it or not, that _might_ be the most romantic thing I've heard. I won't say that I enjoy that it is so, but as you can probably imagine my personality does not typically endear people to whisper sweet nothings to me. And for the most part I have not wanted to hear them either, although for some godforsaken reason the crudities that come out of your mouth will sometimes make my teeth hurt from how sweet they are, and I do not find it unwelcome. Do with that what you will.

Also Willing to be Pushed Up Against a Wall,

Laurent

PS--You are crazier than I give you credit for if you think I am going to call a pig anything except breakfast.

\- July 20th -

Laurent,

I CANNOT BELIEVE that you blindsided me at my own ball with Damianos Akielos, of all people. I knew I should have pushed you to tell me who you were bringing beforehand, but Helene convinced me not to and told me to respect your privacy. I see now that was a mistake. I didn't even know that the two of you were still speaking after you finished dealing with that land issue, or whatever it was you were going on about a few months ago, but the two of you looked very friendly and I can't imagine it is only because you managed to get your way with the land. Damianos especially was looking at you as if you hung the moon. You did look dashing though, baby brother, so it's really no surprise. You turned more than a few heads; it is a shame you don't come out in public more. Don't groan (I know you just did, don't lie) I am just making sure that I am my usual overbearing self when it comes to you.

I suppose that I will have no problem convincing you to come out to the country estate this winter, seeing as how it abuts the Akielos estate. Do you remember one year, I want to say you were either ten or eleven, when we sneaked out at night to watch that giant bonfire that the Akielos family had lit? They were dancing around it like heathens and we were both laughing so hard that I thought we would surely give ourselves away, but what ended up doing it in the end was the grass stains on your knees that you would not explain to mother. I think she was more angry about the fact that you refused to say even a single word about it than the ruined clothes or the fact that we very obviously had sneaked out. That memory was the first thing I thought of when you introduced Damianos and I swear I could still smell the smoke from that night on him. 

At any rate, I will not drag this out. I am exceedingly tired from the party and will probably sleep for days. I will be recovered enough for our usual tea on Thursday, so I will see you soon.

Yours forever,

Auguste

PS--I am glad it was not liver man. 

\- July 27th -

Laurent,

I forgot to ask you yesterday when I called on you (please excuse me, I found my mouth occupied with more important things) but I wanted to know if you would be willing to do me a favor. And since I know you will force me to phrase it this way in retaliation for what I did to you so many weeks ago now, I will write it out explicitly:

Laurent, would you please accompany me to my family's end of the season ball so that I do not have to attend it by myself and can instead spend it with you, a person who I find increasingly that I want to spend more and more time with and who would help make the evening more than bearable and who may even help bring said evening into utterly delightful territory?

With bated breath,

Damen

\- July 29th -

Damen,

That was hardly _explicit_. Perhaps if you were to tell me what this evening would entail-- _explicitly_ \--I would be more amenable to joining you.

Also with bated breath,

Laurent

PS--Yes I am serious.

\- August 1st -

Laurent,

If you think I'm one to back down from a challenge like that, you are sorely mistaken. Here is what you could expect if you accompanied me to the ball:

After our carriage pulls up at the front, I would introduce you to my brother as we make our way inside the house. Instead of being a polite host he would greet you by saying something that's almost rude but not quite rude enough that it would allow you to call him out on it, at which point you would respond with something so witty and caustic I would have to bite my tongue so I do not laugh in his face. He would then introduce you to Jokaste, the woman he's been courting (and previously mentioned paramour who is spreading rumors about me to the _ton_ ) and she would say something so saccharinely sweet to you, most likely about your appearance because that is always what she goes for first, and it would be so subtle that most people would consider it a compliment but you will know, since you are so clever, that it is not a compliment at all. Kastor will then say something condescending to me, at which point you'd get angry and say something that will most likely pit Kastor against you forever but that I would secretly play over and over in my mind every time he and I fought in the future and which would bring me great comfort. That will be the opening volley in an attack that will likely last the entirety of the night, if not longer, unless you manage to avoid the two of them (which I will be more than happy to help with). 

After that, I will introduce you to my step-mother who is an absolute dear and she will adore you immediately because she can always tell such things about people. She may try to pinch your cheek. If so that is a good sign. My uncle Makedon will be there too and will invite you to a drinking contest which I suggest you do not accept (I know you like challenges as much as I do, but I am advising you on this because I quite like your brain as it is and would hate to see it turned into mush) and, depending on how many other people have already accepted that challenge, may ask you to arm wrestle him. I would also suggest not accepting that; he is a good thirty years older than you and I but he is as strong as an ox. Speaking of, it is around this time that we typically release any farm animals that will deign to make an appearance, so you will need to be prepared for that. Please do not wear shoes that will slip easily, the mud will do you no favors as you try to catch whichever animal has been loosed for the night.

There will be dancing and dinner and possibly singing as well, but all of these depend on the state of inebriation of the guests and so unfortunately I cannot say in which order they will appear. When you are ready to leave we will depart and I will deposit you safely at your home where we will part ways until I can call on you again (or you I).

What do you say? Anything in my explicit forecast of the evening that sounds enticing to you? 

Your Hopeful Host for the Night,

Damen

\- August 1st -

Damen,

None of that sounded particularly enticing. 

Reluctantly,

Laurent

PS--I do not know whether or not to take your comment about the farm animals seriously, and that worries me.

\- August 3rd -

Laurent,

I live to please you, and I am totally despondent to hear that I was unable to give you what you wanted. Please let me try again. How about this:

The order of the first part will remain mostly the same. I don't believe there is any way of getting out of that, or any way for me to sugar coat it that will make it somehow more bearable. But now, after you turn down my uncle Makedon when he challenges you to the drinking contest, I will ask you to dance. You will accept, and we'll join the other dancers on the dance floor but it won't matter how many people there are because I'll only have eyes for you, and you won't be able to look away as the only thought in your brain will be about how handsome I am. Every time we touch you'll blush, thinking about what I'm going to do to you later when I finally get you alone (details to come shortly) and then after the music is over I'll take you by the hand and lead you outside. You'll be overheated, you see, from the close air of all the other dancers and the exertion of the dancing itself, and will ask me if there's anywhere we can go for some fresh air, and I know just the place. There's a bench that's just outside the house that's shaded by a large tree and tucked into a tiny alcove underneath the balcony; it being early autumn the tree will still have all of its foliage and will hide us from sight of the other party goers. No one else will know that little safe haven is there because no one else knows the layout of the estate as well as I do, having grown up there, and so we'll sit down there for a minute so that we can both catch our breaths.

Eventually you'll set down your drink (some punch I grabbed for you before we went outside, because I am an attentive host like that) and set your hand on the bench. I'll put mine over yours so gently in a romantic gesture like a true gentleman, and you'll take that moment to lace our fingers together for just a few seconds before getting up and straddling me right there on the bench, taking my face in between your hands and kissing me senseless. I'll tell you that we really shouldn't, that we are slightly hidden but anyone could walk up on us at any time, and you'll tell me that you don't care because you want me so much that you don't care who sees us. I'll put up another half-hearted protest but at this point your lust for me cannot be stopped, and you'll look so beautiful with the moonlight turning your blonde hair almost white and your cheeks will be flushed from the dancing and the punch and from what we're doing and by then any semblance of protests from me will be silenced. And I'll let you have your way with me on the bench in the garden and then that will become my new most favorite party I've ever been to. 

How is that? Does that entice you any more than the first?

Waiting patiently on the bench,

Damen

PS--I will not clarify anything about any farm animals. I prefer to keep an air of mystery around myself.

\- August 3rd -

Oh

Well

That does sound more enticing than the first, although I can't help but let you know that you're being very presumptuous about how willing I am to get caught doing unspeakable (unwriteable?) things to you in public--despite any amount of foliage on that tree--especially during what is sure to be a very busy party. Perhaps we can change that part a little and stick to just some chaste conversation in the garden and then, after you become unbearably aroused by how much you adore me and how much you want to take me right there despite the other guests standing not ten feet away because you are a wild animal like that and have no manners at all when it comes to your overwhelming passion for me, you'll suggest that it's time to leave, and we'll get into the carriage and you'll instruct the driver to take me home but I'll tell you that perhaps I'm not feeling entirely well--too much punch, maybe, or it could be the dancing that did it--and that I had better have you take me to your place where you can keep an eye on me and make sure I'm properly taken care of. And I'm sure you will take _very_ good care of me. You're nothing if not thorough.

Would that be an agreeable compromise? If you're amenable to the proposed changes then my answer will be a resounding yes. Honestly (and I should not admit this to you, but I will anyway) I would have gone with you regardless, if only to ensure that we are even on the "forcing the other to go to a party" front. However I do commend your commitment to convincing me, and I do believe this may be the first engagement I've been invited to that I'm actually looking forward to. 

Fully enticed,

Laurent

PS--It figures that the air of mystery you cultivate would have to do with whether or not a cow will suddenly show up in the drawing room.

\- August 4th -

Laurent,

Between the two of us you have always been the smarter one (I am only the brawn, remember?). I prefer your suggestion much more than mine. Even if I struggle with imagining you engaging in anything that can be described as "chaste conversation". I believe that I am looking forward to this ball possibly more than I have looked forward to anything in my life.

Most definitely thorough,

Damen

PS--I do not allow cows in the drawing room, you heathen. They are only allowed in the parlor.

\- August 9th -

Damen,

Well. That was--

I think you are making me start to like going to parties.

Very thoroughly taken care of,

Laurent

\- August 10th -

Laurent,

Really? Because I am starting to like them less. Every good thing that happens at these parties involves you and no one else, and I find that most parties (by design, unfortunately) have an abundance of people who are not you. People who want to dance with me when I only want to dance with you. People who want to talk to me when I only want to hear your voice. People who want me to be polite and attentive when you are there on the other side of the room talking to someone and you're laughing and I want to know what it was that made you smile like that but I can't, because I am supposed to have manners and I cannot shove them away from me like I want to do in my haste to get over to you.

At the same time, I suppose I can see your point. I don't think I've ever had such a time as I had with you yesterday (our time at the ball included, although what came after was even more fun, as crass at that may be to admit). I could have spent all day in bed looking at you, touching you, running my fingers over all of that pale, perfect skin of yours. I remember the way you looked at me that second time, when we went slower and I took you apart so, so carefully, and the way you said my name over and over like it was a prayer--I will never forget that, and I will forever hear it in the cadence of your voice whenever you say my name.

With much affection,

Damen

\- August 10th -

Damen,

Perhaps we can cut out the pretense of needing to go to a ball this time and you can just come over right now.

Laurent

\- August 10th -

Laurent,

I was already dressed and on my way. I hope you do not think me presumptuous.

Damen

\- August 25th -

Laurent,

I know it seems silly to ask, seeing as how we have spent most of these past few weeks exclusively in each other's company, but are you planning on joining your family at the de Vere country estate this fall? I have some business (as always) to attend to in London but if I knew that you were going to be there I could find some excuses to join my family as well, if only so we can keep up this schedule of getting to see each other more than is probably seemly.

Yours,

Damen

PS--I hope you realize how much I like you based on the fact that I am willing to go spend time with my brother just so I can be within a five mile radius of you.

\- August 26th -

Damen,

I was planning on going up there at some point, yes. And I'll admit that I was hoping that perhaps our country neighbors would be in town as well; having a wealth of families to call on for dinner and other little get-togethers makes the evenings go by so much quicker, don't you agree? But of course our family has never called on yours to dine with them. I wonder why that is? Perhaps they knew that you would be irrevocably smitten with me and that you would be ruined for any other partner once my caustic wit burned into your soul, and they did not want to ruin your prospects like that. Do you think it likely?

If you do manage to make it up to your brother's estate, I hope you will come riding with me at least once. I will show you all of the secret places I used to hide when I was a child. If you are very good I may even show you where my brother and I would hide to watch the heathen Akielos family dance around their giant bonfires.

I am, as always, your

Laurent

PS--I do realize the sacrifices you are making, having to spend time with Kastor just to be within walking distance of me. I promise I will make it worth your while, even if I can't quite empathize with your distaste of brothers.

\- August 27th -

Laurent,

You see, you have given yourself away and I wonder if you even realize it yet. I always suspected, of course, that you had a long standing fascination with me and my brawn (which recent events have confirmed, since when we're alone you can hardly ever stop grabbing at me (which I enjoy more than I can describe, don't get me wrong)) but I had no idea that it went so far back. You say you sneaked out of your house to watch me dance around the bonfire? Tell me, did you know even then that you wanted me, even if you weren't able to put it into words yet? Did you decide, one night while you were watching me from your secret hiding place, that one day I would be yours, and did you make your claim on me right then and there with all the authority that a youthful declaration of love carries? I hardly had a chance, did I, once you set your sights on me? 

Completely bewitched by you,

Damen

\- August 28th -

My completely bewitched lover,

As always, you are half right and half wrong. You are right about the fact that you didn't stand a chance once I set my sights on you--as evidenced by the fact that you believe me to have colluded in some sort of witchcraft in order to explain your level of infatuation with me. I am pleased that your level of attraction is so great that you have to use the supernatural to explain it, don't misunderstand me, it is not a slight of any kind. However, you are wrong about me sneaking out to specifically spy on you--our hiding place was good enough to see a broad picture of your revelries, but not close enough to make out any specific person therein and I do not believe that I could have picked you out of a crowd from that distance even if I had the wherewithal at the time to look.

I do not want to disappoint your fantasies too much, however. So I will tell you a secret to make up for it. I spoke to you in one of our previous communications about how, before we met at the property that day so many months ago now, we had not seen each other in ten years. That is not entirely accurate, although for you it may be as I seriously doubt you noticed me. About five years ago, when I was either seventeen or eighteen, my brother and I were walking through Kensington Gardens on a bright spring day. As we passed the lake we were distracted by a scuffle over near a copse of trees. As we looked over (and pretended not to notice anything, in the way of true gentlemen) I made out your countenance there, in some sort of playful physical dispute with a friend--Nikandros, perhaps. I remember he looked familial and thought him to possibly be a cousin of yours, and I am sure it wasn't Kastor. I recognized you instantly; you had filled out some since I had last seen you when you were only sixteen, but you are always unmistakable, Damianos. You and maybe-Nikandros had discarded your coats and were grappling like barbarians while two or three others cheered you on, and we hurried away so as not to be contaminated by your wildness. It was wholly improper for you to be acting thusly; you would have been twenty or twenty one, and really should have known better. 

But I thought of you that night, Damianos. Right as I was about to fall asleep--I blamed it on just a dream for the longest time, but I know I was in at least some control of my thoughts as I took myself in hand and brought myself off to the thought of you grappling with _me_ , pinning me to the ground with those ridiculous muscles straining against the thin shirt you wore, the faintest sheen of sweat on your brow, glancing down at me with that warm, melty look you get when you are taken over by lust and want nothing more in the entire world than to please me.

I will admit that perhaps that memory is colored now by my more intimate knowledge of you. If you had asked me to recall this memory a year ago I would perhaps not have worded it quite the same, although a year ago I would never have admitted to any of that even if my life were at stake, so I suppose the distinction is meaningless. Still, I hope it is some consolation to you, and I hope that telling you this does not make you unbearably egotistical.

Yours, 

Someone who thinks of you every night and decidedly more often than that

PS--If you have not already dressed and called for your carriage to be made ready for you to come call on me at this very moment, I will be very disappointed.

\- October 13th -

Laurent,

This business matter I am handling right now is the most frustrating thing I have ever done, made even worse because I know that it is a simple job that I should be able to do in my sleep and I am just unable to concentrate with you away. What point is there in doing anything when I know that there is no chance that you will show up on my doorstep tonight with some harebrained scheme that I will not be able to talk you out of, or knowing that your house is empty and I cannot sneak up to your bedroom and fuck you senseless? Ah, please ignore how boorish I am being, I know you will say something like that after you read my words, it is just that I do not like being away from you and I cannot seem to help myself.

I will be concluding this business within the week and will be joining you by next weekend (well, technically I will be at the Akielos estate, but it is close to you and that is good enough for me), and it is still not soon enough. I miss you like an ache.

Frustrated and lonely, 

Damen

\- October 15th -

My poor, frustrated Damen,

The only consolation I can give you right now is that by the time you read this there will be even less time before we are able to be back in each other's company once more. I am enjoying my time here with my brother and his family but...oh, I don't wish to do this over a letter, but I fear I won't have the courage in person (or the ability to speak, once I let you have your way with me, which I'll be unable to deny either to you or myself the instant I see you). I have always considered myself an independent, a loner, someone who could benefit from the presence of others but could do just as well without. But having you gone these past few weeks...I wonder if I can truly say that about myself anymore, because I feel as if something important has been ripped from me. I feel as if my shadow has fled my body, like something I had expected would always be there is just...not. I will turn to you at dinner time to whisper a joke and it takes me a moment to realize you are not there; at night, my hands will seek the warmth of a body that I cannot find. I am not...glad, exactly, to hear that you feel similarly, but it does warm me a bit to know you are just as lost without me as I am without you. And I am very glad that it will be remedied soon.

Waiting very impatiently,

Laurent

\- October 16th -

Dearest Mother,

I am exceedingly happy to tell you that my business has concluded a few days early, so I will be joining you and Kastor on Wednesday evening rather than Saturday, as planned. I hope this does not cause too much fretting from the servants; I will be happy enough to sleep in the stables if needed, I really don't mind.

I am also hoping, if it is not too much trouble, that we could perhaps invite the de Veres over for dinner one evening. I know our family has typically not socialized with them in the past but I would like to change that. I know that Kastor is still salty about the land thing but it really worked out very well for everyone in the end, and the tenant I spoke to you about is in better care with the de Veres than he ever was with us. I can fill you in on all the details when I get there, if you are interested. Laurent has really done a lot to help the people living there, and more besides. I know that I once told you I thought him cold, back when we were still arguing over the details of the issue, but I know him better now, and he is so much more than the haughty facade he shows everyone. I think I like him rather a lot, mama. I think--well, we can talk later. I do not want to take up too much of your time reading my silly letters.

I will see you in just a few days, unless I hear otherwise from you.

All my love,

Damen

\- October 17th -

My dear son,

You know of course you are welcome to visit at any time. I always have your room ready in case you decide to make a surprise visit--I always want you to feel at home, and I suspect too that the moment I let the linens get dusty you will show up on my doorstep, grinning wildly and offering to sleep in the barn and you know I will not tolerate that, my little Damen. You are too close to being a wild animal as it is.

And do not trouble yourself about inviting the de Veres to dinner--it has already been taken care of, by necessity, actually, since the Viscount invited Kastor and I to tea last week and I, of course, could not help but invite them to dine with us in payment for such an invitation. Your Laurent was there too, and he hides it well but I knew he was the instigator of the whole endeavor. As if either one of those handsome boys had nothing better to do than invite an old woman for tea! But they are both smart young things, and make good conversation, and I enjoyed my time there very much. Your Laurent even showed me around the greenhouse and we chatted most happily for about an hour; I do believe that he is fully capable of taking over the world, my little Damen. And he is good for you. You are a wild and free creature, my darling, and I can tell that he adores this about you (yes we did talk about you some, but don't get a big head about it--I think we talked about horses just as much) but he is a subtle, careful little thing, and I think the two of you balance each other out. Plus I am sure the sparks that fly from when the two of you clash with each other are more fun than anything. Don't blush! I am an old woman and I know about such things, don't think I don't.

At any rate, I will be delighted to see you so soon. I know you will want to go visit your sweetheart the instant you arrive but you must make sure to first come and kiss me hello. I shall be very angry at you if you do not.

All of my love,

Mama

\- October 22nd -

Auguste,

I know you are having some friends over for tea today, would it be all right if I invited Damen to come over as well? The more the merrier, my annoying older brother always says in a tone of voice that would make you think he came up with that statement himself.

Fondly,

Laurent

\- October 22nd -

Laurent, of course you may invite Damen, you don't even need to ask. I thought he wasn't to arrive for a few days time? But if he is here he of course has a standing invitation to join us. Brat.

\- October 22nd -

Damen,

I am still in shock over seeing you yesterday. I can't believe you finished your business three days early and didn't even tell me; you're lucky I didn't fall off my horse when I saw you walking towards me on the moors yesterday. I thought you some sort of feverish hallucination for a moment before I realized that you were, in fact, flesh and blood and that it was possible that I could very well trample you in my haste to determine if you were real or not. And then--oh god, Damen, the feel of your lips against mine, the way your hands felt against me, I had been dreaming of it for so long but it's so different to finally get to experience it in person once more. I thought I might not be able to breathe except you were there, pushing the breath out of my lungs for me, and I thought that my skin might burst into flames if you were not there to soothe the fury within me. I wanted you inside of me so much, Damen, I could practically cry from the wanting of it. And I want you still; I can't even think straight because my every thought skitters away to what it will feel like taking you inside of me once more. Please come visit me right now. I know it's improper and the middle of the day but I am ready for you, body and soul.

Impatiently waiting,

Laurent

\- October 23rd -

Damianos,

I hope you are feeling quite all right, you looked rather feverish and jittery when you joined us for tea yesterday. Laurent asked if he could invite you but I didn't realize that it would require you running your horse to nearly exhaustion to make it over here in time; it would have been all right if you were late, my friend! We do not stand on ceremony here.

At any rate, I wanted to inquire after your health and ensure that you were doing okay. The local doctor mentioned something about a flu making its way through the population here and I hope you have not been inflicted with it, so soon after your arrival, too. If you need anything you have but to ask. I will send Laurent over with some chicken noodle soup if you like.

Kindly,

Auguste

\- October 23rd -

Laurent,

You are a menace. I don't know how you managed to look at me with a straight face after writing me that letter knowing I was walking into the longest, most boring tea party ever, but if I had to guess it has something to do with you being part demon. Believe me, nothing could have made me happier than the fact that once we were alone I got to slowly take all of that self control away from you piece by piece until you were a crying, shivering mess. You're beautiful when you beg, sweetheart, do you know that? You're beautiful all the time, of course, but having you laid out for me, naked and sweating and begging for me to wreck you--I don't think there's anything in the entire world that can come close to that kind of beauty.

Utterly yours,

Damen

PS--You're just as gorgeous when you're crying. I rather think I'd like to see that again too.

\- October 23rd -

Damen,

You're acting like everything that happened yesterday wasn't part of my plan. I assure you, if you consider anything that you did to me as some sort of payback for tricking you then you have been even further deceived. That was...I'm not even sure if I have the words to describe it. I just know it would not be unwelcome if it were to happen again.

I am, as always when in your company,

Completely satisfied and happy,

Laurent

PS--You know what you need to do to get me into that state again. If you liked it so much logic dictates that you only have to repeat the process that elicited that response the first time. I would definitely not complain. 

\- October 23rd -

~~Laurent,~~

~~I think I'm in love with you~~

\- November 14th -

Damen,

It was good of you to come with me to see how Mrs. Varenne and Mr. Aktis are faring. I was glad to see that the construction is nearly complete (I have been in contact with the general contractor, of course, but it is always difficult to manage such things at a distance), or at least done enough to allow them some semblance of normalcy in their daily lives. I am also glad that Mrs. Varenne did not call us out for bickering again; perhaps she noticed some change in our demeanor since the last time we visited. If the way Mr. Aktis was looking at her, or she him, was any indication, we have not been the only ones who have found happiness due to this land issue, and if my instincts are correct then I am happy for them. Perhaps I shouldn't have bothered converting that barn after all; it would be a shame if they married soon and it went into disuse once again. Well, a shame rather for me and my pocketbook, not for them, of course.

I'm writing you because I've been thinking about returning to London for a few weeks before I am due back for Christmas. This house is lovely, of course, and the company has been quite pleasant, but I miss the quiet solitude of my own home. Having two children running around all day is exhausting, I don't know how Auguste does it. Well, I suppose I do know--he has Helene and a bevy of servants that help him, that's how. At any rate I have already stayed past when I had intended due to certain...pressures, let's say, from an attentive neighbor, but as I have heard rumors he is also planning to leave soon I find that my patience for staying here is growing thin. I grow restless and I suspect that some quality family time between Auguste and his brood would not go amiss either.

I will miss being able to hop on a horse and ride straight over to your estate without having to worry about visiting hours and the like (do not protest, I know I have violated those hours before, I do not want to hear it). You know it is different out here, and I only mention it because I suspect you feel the same. Getting to wander the grounds with you when it is still chilly in the morning, going riding whenever we please, that time when I was accosted by a scoundrel while walking through the forest and taken right up against a tree like an animal...the country does have its merits. But I suspect that once all of the scoundrels are gone from here then I will look upon London with fondness, and not the country; there seems to be a simple reason why, but I am hesitant to spell it out in so many words. I think you know, though.

Yours,

Laurent

\- November 16th -

Laurent,

I know you are leaving today, and I hope this reaches you before you are gone. Otherwise it will have to wait to find you at your London residence, and I wanted you to have something that you could read in the carriage on your way back, so you would think of me on your journey. Do you know when I first wanted to kiss you? It wasn't at your brother's party; that was just the day that I couldn't stop myself from doing so any longer. It was earlier than that, and by more than a few weeks, too. We had just dined together and were sitting in your drawing room, both of us reading the evening away, although I think I stared at you more than I did at my book. Something in what you were reading made you smile, and your lips curled up in that delightful way they do whenever you are amused, and right then I would have given anything to be able to taste that smile of yours. I wanted to trace the pattern of it with my lips and learn every curve of them; I wanted to kiss you until you couldn't breathe, or until you forgot how. I don't ever think I've felt such wanting as I did right in that moment, and I assumed if only I could kiss you, just once, I wouldn't feel that desperate, clawing feeling anymore, like my heart was trying to beat its way out of my chest--but of course that feeling has not abated, not at one or two or a hundred kisses, and I do not anticipate that it will let up any time soon, if ever.

I do not know why this memory has stayed with me for this long. I have so many other delightful memories to choose from--the way you shudder when I take you into my mouth, maybe, or the way you look when you are sleeping, naked and curled up next to me, or perhaps even the way you look when you are taken against a tree by a scoundrel (to be fair, I do enjoy that memory quite a bit). But sometimes I will catch myself smiling, or someone else will, and when I think on why that is it always seems to be that memory of you in the drawing room, and how much I wanted to kiss you then.

I will be in town within the week, and I can assure you that I will come over as soon as I am able to try to kiss that smile of yours once again.

I am, forever and always, your

Damen

PS--I know this isn't quite the confession that yours was--you know the one I speak of. I keep that letter close to my heart and read it every time I find myself alone in bed and missing you. But I hope you enjoy it all the same.

\- November 17th -

My Damianos,

Did you ever think about what it was that I was smiling at, that night you wrote me about? Perhaps I was smiling because I was thinking on a certain handsome gentleman who was pretending, very badly, to read a book, and who couldn't take his eyes off of me for a single second. I doubt you could tell me what book you were reading that night, not for all the gold in the world, but I would bet that you could recreate the slant of my lips perfectly. I am not so innocent and unaware as all that, my heart. Still, it makes me glad to know that you have thought about it, and that it is still something you think about even now. I wonder if I would have let you kiss me that night, instead of at the party; I suspect yes, because I can't imagine a world in which I would ever deny myself a chance to kiss you, but I also cannot complain about how our path has gone in this world, and I would not want do anything to jeopardize that, if going back in time was even an option. Ah, I am being silly, I know. I hate traveling and I miss you already and I would spend the rest of this letter expounding on that, except I do still have some pride. So I will just end this here, knowing I will get to see you soon, and that will have to be enough for me.

All my love,

Laurent

\- December 19th -

To: Lord Laurent de Vere

From: Mr. Aktis and Mrs. Varenne

We formally invite you to take part in a ceremony joining together the two souls

who you have helped in their time of need, and in doing so have brought together

four people who could not be happier to become a family. Ceremony to take place

on January 2nd, so we may celebrate the start of our new lives

with the start of the new year.

Forever Grateful,

the future Mr. and Mrs. Aktis

and Vivianne and Sophia

\- December 20th -

Laurent,

I suppose you will take no comfort in the fact that you were right about Mrs. Varenne and Mr. Aktis, since you are often right about so many other things and being such is a common occurrence for you. It is fortunate that both of us are going to be in the area anyway; it will save us additional travel, which I know you do not like, although I can't say I share you distaste for it. This time on the journey out to the country I am going to be sharing my carriage with an attractive blonde who I know will help me pass the time pleasantly. 

Also, I already know who I am bringing to this wedding. Would you like me to tell you about him?

Signed,

Someone who is doing this instead of working

\- December 20th -

Dear Procrastinator,

I would of course like to hear about your date to the wedding. I have no work that I am looking to be distracted from but I think that your missive will be a delightful diversion nonetheless. That is, assuming it does not delay any plans you have for later in the evening, which I may have a vested interest in.

Signed,

An attractive blonde

\- December 20th -

Laurent,

First off, I have not directly asked him yet, so you mustn't say anything about it. I have a feeling he might be expecting the two of us to go together, but I do so love to keep him on his toes so I will wait a few days to bring it up, I think. He might start to get a little annoyed, expecting me to be a little more urgent, but I adore when he is slightly cross at me. Sometimes he will furrow his brow and look at me as if I am a giant puzzle to be solved; what he has never quite learned, despite how clever he is, is that I simply like to imagine running my fingers over that crease on his forehead, softening it until all of his confusion coalesces into the clear understanding that to solve me he only has to know that I am hopelessly, entirely, desperately in love with him in all of his forms. Sometimes too when he is in that mood he will kiss me a little harder than is usually preferred, and manhandle me in a way that can only be described as arrogantly presumptuous. And do you want to know a secret? I love when he is like that too, perhaps more than I care to admit. 

But sometimes he is not in a mood like that at all. Sometimes he is slow and thoughtful and exceedingly careful. He will always be the most clever and brilliant person I have ever met, or ever will meet, and I do not believe that that will ever change no matter his mood. And he is sweet, which is something he would not want me to tell you. He is sweet and can be very charming when he wants to be. I will also tell you (again in secret, you mustn't breathe a word to him about it) that he has quite ruined me for any other company. His is the only face I want to see when I wake up in the mornings, and the only one I want to fall asleep next to at night. He is the only one I want to push up against the bookcases (he's often reading, you see, as he is quite the bookworm, so it is only natural that I have thought about this particular situation in great detail) and kiss until all coherent thoughts and words leave his brain. He is the other half of my soul, and I never want to be parted from him.

So, what do you think? Do you think such a man would ever consent to be my date?

Eagerly awaiting your answer,

Damen

PS--I will not be late tonight, you do not have to worry on that front. As if something as silly as business would keep me from you.

PPS--Did I mention that he is also the most gorgeous creature I have ever laid eyes on? Because he is, and I have never seen any other person in the world that even comes close to his beauty.

\- December 20th -

Damen,

I think such a man as you described would have to be a colossal fool to say no to someone like you. I do not think you have to worry about him turning you down in this or any other matter, although perhaps I might advise that you might not drag things out and just ask him tonight. I am sure he would still treat you with that loving cruelty that you adore so much if you just asked nicely. The way you describe him...I have a feeling that someone like that would do absolutely anything for you, anything that you asked. He sounds like he loves you very much, to the end of the world and back again, and feels those (thankfully, increasingly rare) times when you are apart as keenly as you do. Although seeing as how he is the other half of your soul, you must know all of this already. I am certain that he has told you in as many words. And I am sure that even when you steal the words away from his mouth he shows you how much he loves you in all the various ways one does such things.

Ah, but you have turned me into a sap, Damianos. I will not write another word today, I will save up whatever this feeling is and wait for you to come home. I will show you then how much I love you with all the violence and arrogance that is in me.

From the end of the world and back again,

Laurent

\- December 20th -

~~You are waiting for me to come home?~~

~~I have no home except you~~

~~I didn't realize that until just now~~

\- January 10th -

Laurent,

I am sorry that I had to leave so suddenly, without hardly even having a chance to say goodbye to you. I'm still trying to sort out this mess that Kastor has gotten into, but the deeper I dig the more it seems to tangle up in front of me. All I know right now is that there are multiple money lenders coming to him for apparently ridiculous back payments that he owes; I don't even know which ones are legitimate and which ones are just circling due to all the blood in the water. It would, of course, be easier if Kastor were actually here, but I have no idea where he has disappeared to. Apparently after Christmas he told mother that he was going back to London but if he is here I haven't been able to find him. Judging from the way the money lenders have been pursuing me I would assume that they have not done anything permanent to him and he has, instead, escaped to the continent to wait for the heat to die down. I wish I could say it is the first time it has happened.

This is not how I wanted our holiday to end. I knew we would have to come back to London eventually and resume our normal lives again, back in our respective ~~homes~~ estates...but I'm not sure how much longer I can do this, Laurent. I'm not sure how much longer I can bear it. Oh, but I do not want to do this over letter. I don't want to do anything over letter with you anymore, even as enjoyable as I have found them in the past. I am sick of letters. I do not want you one letter away but here in front of me so I can watch your sharp eyes, always assessing, hear your biting words, feel your clever fingers, experience every part of you. I'm not sure what I am trying to say, not anymore. The words are all jumbled up now.

Damen

\- January 10th -

Damen, what are you saying? I know I have complained about your handwriting before but your letter was almost undecipherable. Do you not...want to continue, as we have been doing? Is that what you're trying to say? I can't make heads or tails of it, and I am anxious about you. About us.

I am coming to London. I will leave in the morning, assuming it does not snow tonight. Frankly I may just leave now; you have me worried and I don't think I would be able to sleep at any rate, not after that letter. I should have just left with you; I should have trusted my gut in this matter and not listened to your objections. I wish I could be there right now so I could try and decipher what is going on behind those big brown eyes of yours.

Laurent

\- January 11th -

I told you, Laurent, you only have to understand one thing to be able to decipher whatever you wish about me, and that is simply how I feel about you. You are the sun, and I can do nothing but wait for the rise and fall of your warmth. You are the moon, which drags at the tides of my heart. You are lava, burning so hotly and passionately and I am hopelessly surrounded by it and want nothing more than to wait for it to consume me. You are ice and I am frozen within it, encased and suspended in your coldness. You are insufferable and I want nothing more than to suffer every inch of you for the rest of my life.

Are those metaphors clumsy enough for you to take my meaning? Maybe I won't send this after all. Maybe it is too ridiculous even for me; but even if I don't, I will know what I mean by it, and know that it is true, as you are true. I hope that you have not actually left the comfort of your brother's house to chase after me in the cold, and at the same time I hope that you have. I will see you soon in any case, although as you are not standing here in front of me it will not be soon enough.

Every bit of my love,

Damen

\- January 13th -

Brother,

I hope you are well, and I hope Damen is all right handling whatever emergency matter required his urgent attention. I cannot help but say I am worried about you, leaving so suddenly in the middle of the night like that, but I know you are capable of handling yourself. Still, a note detailing your welfare would not be amiss, and it would put my mind at ease.

Love,

Auguste

\- January 14th -

Auguste,

I am sorry to worry you so. I meant to write earlier but I found myself busy trying to help Damen untangle this mess between Kastor and his creditors; I believe between the two of us we have figured it out, but it has meant a lot of sleepless nights of poring over tedious accounting sheets and badly written letters, so you'll have to excuse me if I was a little eager to avoid one more. Not that writing you is ever a chore, brother; it is just that for a while I thought my eyes might very well pop out of my head and sometimes I believed I had forgotten how to read.

At any rate I am doing well, as is Damen. I did not take cold thanks to the scarf and mittens that Helene gave me, so please give her my love and tell her she has saved me from a week of the sniffles for which I am eternally grateful. And give my nephews a kiss as well, and tell them that I miss them and that the next time I visit I promise I will finish our game of chess with them, and that I most emphatically did not run away because I knew that my inevitable defeat was on the horizon.

With all my love,

Laurent

PS--I know you were planning on staying out at the estate until March or April until the weather improved, but Damen and I are getting married in a few weeks and I was hoping that you would all be amenable to coming down to London for that. Or I suppose we could come up and have the ceremony there, but we would need to impose upon you once again to host not only us but a few of Damen's friends as well and I hate to ask such a favor from you.

PPS--On second thought, I suppose his mother could host some of his friends. I am sure she would be agreeable. I will let you know what we decide.

\- January 15th -

WHAT

LAURENT

THAT IS NOT FUNNY

What is happening

I am an old man, it is not nice of you to play tricks on me like this

WRITE ME BACK IMMEDIATELY YOU CRETIN

ARE YOU SERIOUSLY GETTING MARRIED

\- January 16th -

Auguste,

You are not so old as all that, and I was hoping it would be rather obvious what I meant. You told me once that he looked at me as if I had hung the moon, and I suppose that for once you were probably right. I will not bore you with too many details, suffice it to say we both agreed that we would be happier if we could do away with the pretense of ever having to leave the other's side. Is that not how these things work, dear brother? A more astute person might have seen this coming. In fact, I would be willing to bet that Helene did not find this a surprise at all. Go on, tell me I am wrong.

At any rate, I know that you will not stay mad for long. We have already bought a house--I would have been fine with moving into either mine or his, but he said he wanted to have something that was especially ours, and I am not one to deny him anything--and our new home is closer to yours than my old place, so you will not have to travel as far to visit for tea. Isn't that something? I knew you would be happy about that. 

I do not want to ramble on eternally, so I will end this by saying only that I am happy, Auguste. Happier than I reasonably thought anyone could ever be, or had any right to be. Damen is a brute but he is my brute and I love him dreadfully.

All my love,

Laurent

PS--Damen has said that he would prefer to have the ceremony up in the country. He does not want his mother to travel in this weather and I though I am loathe to make the journey again, and so soon, I agree with him. I hope this does not inconvenience you too much. 

\- February 10th -

Husband,

Have I told you how much I adore calling you that? I suppose I probably have. I know you said that you were sick of letters but I think you will find that this is the best kind of letter--one which I am going to hand deliver to you, since you are only sitting a few feet away from me as I write it. You don't know it yet, as you sit there reading the morning paper (or pretend to; I can't help but notice you staring out of the corner of my eye, even now), but I am about to write out in glorious detail what I am going to do to you once you have this in your hands. First, as you are in the process of reading this, I will slide my hands over your shoulders and around your neck, resting my chin on the top of your head so I may watch as you then throw the letter to the ground and turn around, grabbing me by the waist and pinning me to the bed, where you will then look down at me so sweetly, and with such open devotion on your face, that I won't be able to resist kissing you--

I don't think I have to write any more. You will have forgotten about this letter already and I will be helpless before you, as always. Just know that after you are done ravishing me and we have both spent some time back in bed, boneless and sweaty and happy, you will pick this up from the floor and remember that you ought to finish it, but it will really only say one thing--the same thing that almost all of my letters to you have said, if you looked closely enough. 

And I will not spell it out for you. I think that you know what I am referring to. And if you do not, you have only to look behind you and see the smile on my face to find your answer.

I remain, forever and always,

Your husband

**Author's Note:**

> I blame this on the fact that I have watched Pride and Prejudice more times than is probably healthy


End file.
